Gods, it’s been a good, but crazy year. A lot’s happened. Like A LOT. I guess this is what I get for picking ‘courage’ as my word of the year. I can’t remember the last thing I talked about, but it’s been a relatively quiet end of the year, in terms of spiritual stuff. There’s a lot of ongoing internal work, and a lot of plans and other things that are taking time to develop and grow.
Things I have been focusing on lately are self-love and self-care. I don’t know if this would’ve come up had I not been shifting into a femme mood all year, but perhaps. Perhaps this is just the mindset I need to really dig into this work and make it happen. See, the problem with being a well-adjusted and functioning human being is that you don’t think you need self-care because what the hell, you just get by. I’m resilient. I can handle this. And yeah, most of the time, I can. But this is something that goes deeper, and in a lot of ways, it’s hard to express. But it’s part of that thing, you can’t love others if you don’t love yourself, yeah? It’s to do with that.
I’ve also started, like, way too many Books of Shadows. All different ones, with their own purpose, but hey, I guess it’s kept me busy while I’ve been contemplating things. I’ve been particularly drawn to the handdrawn/line art/colouring book styles, with pdfs to download, where I can craft my own book in the way I want to craft it. It also helped me use up some old notebooks and give them a purpose at last. So that’s been fun.
The other big thing is I’m going to be totally redoing my bedroom again. The walls need repainting, but honestly, the energy’s just got a bit stale, too, so I want to just take everything out, declutter, repaint the walls, and shift everyrthing around. I feel like it’s not at all surprising that I want to put my bed on the western wall, which I associate with water, which just resonates very strongly with Aphrodite for obvious reasons. I’ve been working with Her lately, and She’ll have a little shrine over there too.
There’s still a lot of planning and budgetting and saving money to go before I do anything, but it’s in progress, and I’ll probably delay my annual State of the Shrines until it’s done, though you might get a mini ‘before’ one around Wep Ronpet/Feb 1 if I don’t plan to finish it by then. It’ll depend on when it all comes together and when I have finalised the design.
I’ve never been much for working with the elements, but I think I’ve grown closer to that direction this year. Certainly, as the most grounded person ever, it’s probably not a bad thing to start working with Water energy. Hence, my sense that the walls are going to be Very Blue. Water blue, not sky blue. So that will be a very interesting change for me, because I’ve never had walls that dark before. I am also planning to finally get my big Sobek statue a cabinet. It just feels time.
So it’ll be that, and the Sobek devotional, that will take up a lot of my time, at least in the early part of the year. Other than that, it’s Sau work, and other magical practices. I really want to get a more consistent witchy practice. I want to build it more than just ‘these are some spells and/or rituals I do every now and then’. I want a coherent structure and theology, and a better sense of what it is I’m trying to do, and what frameworks I’m using.
The two women I met in the middle of the year and became good friends with, we’re still keen on group work. It’s just there’s a lot of stuff getting in the way. Hopefully, things will begin to change, now that some of the obstables are out of the way. I’ll be interested to see where this goes. And one of them joined ADF without even telling me. XD We can be Dedicant buddies now. <3
Anyway. It’s now 2018, so I guess this is my first entry for the new year. Here’s hoping it’s full of more courage and wonderful things. Maybe I’ll come back and make another post when I have thought of the other things I’m sure I meant to tell you. 😀